months since my last post

i'm definitely in state of insomnia now, i can't sleep, i can't do anything...i'll be sitting for my exam tomorrow...i've never been this depressed during exam time before, maybe it's because i'm now studying law...which i can only describe as ridiculous! does law really need long, confusing, boring sentences??????? no wonder when people done something wrong, they don't even knew it was forbidden by law....ha3...by the way, i was memorizing instead of understanding...because, in KPPK 2213, your answer must be exactly the same as in the Akta Makanan 1983...the whole book to memorise? i rather die! i'm quite depressed...and definitely, homesick too...i couldn't wait to be home which is, next wednesday! totally sick of laws!

i'm tired

i can't wait to be in sibu again..this weekend. i'm having my mid-sem break and i would like to rest a bit from all college stuffs. hopefully, no assignment! and yes, i'm a bit cranky now..not in the mood at all. well, life in college is so boring and stressful..ha3..well, at least i got a job in the end. can't wait for the sem break! and, i've been working on my latest addition to my body..working on sessions but, it's worth it! i wouldn't upload the pic..untill it's finish so wait up! well, chow!

In lack of photos and ideas...

Hah..i guess it's months since my last update. nothing interesting happen tho' in those period. and i just got my dongle fixed so now, i can online 24-7 as i wish. ha3..great! what have i been doing for the last few weeks? well, quite a lot of partying and eating. one thing for sure, i have lost a few kilos..i can finally use my surf pants again! hooray! thanks mee sedaap! hahahah..well, few days ago, my coursemate and i were taken to Kpg Tabuan something2 to catch mosquito for study. damn, now i got mosquito bites all over my body. quite tiring tho' but i've some fun. it's way better than spending hours in college! hahahahah...and last week, i went to Tambak to watch some cars racing. damn, i've fallen in love with v-tec! such a nice sound..the roar..the deep roar! i wish i have enough money to buy Honda cars..hush..just a dream i guess. and yes, my friends and i went to SOHO and party..nothing i need to explain tho'..you get the pic.. clubbing scene in Kuching is way better than Sibu..my next journey would be either Paragon or Barzing..ha3..just wait untill payday! that's all i guess in conclusion what i've been doing..besides endless lectures and credit hour hunting!

what's up with 2010?!

i got to admit that this is one of the worst year in my life..it started with sadness, sorrow and not to mention it's getting on my nerve! i never have been expecting it would be as bad as this. hmm..today i got trouble with mr.pengarah and the gang for some issues i rather not be telling about. it's all a mess! and yet, the year just started! life is another chore that i've to put up to.. please tell me, that life is worth to be redeem! i simply couldn't find any joy..hmm..i feel the tense.. it's breaking me apart..please help me someone..i just need someone to bail me out! and plus, i hate this college! if mr.SIRIM are reading this, KKAK doesn't deserve the MS:ISO standard because they do nothing to make life better for the students here instead, they extort us, threaten us with our bonds and implement stupid and crazy rules which for most of free and civilised being couldn't accpet! please, be considerate! how would they feel if their sons and daughters in my shoes? i just want to break free..all i can say..WTF!!!!! F**k!!!!!!! F**K!!!!

lost..never be back again..

it has been awhile since my last update. and in that while. i've lost one of my trusted and closest friend. Doster. that's his name. i've never thought i could lost a friend like him. he's always been the one with the jokes and laughter. everybody seems to be happy when he is around and, i know that for sure because we all still laugh when we remember the good times we had with him. i don't even regard him as a friend but, as one of my brothers. we always have that brotherhood bonds in our band. i know i've always been a really good friend. we always fight and argue in most of the things but, brothers also had fights right? i still remember when we argue all over the weekend when we're doing a gig in Mukah. he's always been the one with the big mouth. he's the funniest guy i've ever known. but, sadly on 17 January 2010. he left us without even saying goodbye. it has been a hard time for him to undergo such a tiring and painful treatment. hmm..the clocks seem to stop ticking the minute i receive the bad news. i've never cried that bad ever since form 5. You'll always be remembered my friend. eventhough you're not here with us. but you'll live on in our melodies and lyrics... Rest In Peace..

never had a chance!

it' been a while since last post and i've never truly had a chance to write a blog bcoz simply, broadband connection totally sucks and i've been busy. hmm..i felt terribly down today.. everything seems to be fuck up in a way that i totally mess everything for me. i just don't know what to say and i do what i'm doing the best..drink till you are drunk! i know and i believe my addiction to nicotine which is harazdous anyway totally help to sort out the pain inside..you will know that i'm not in the mood when you see me smoking the fag continously till i sleep..and that's what i do today..hmm..what life's all about anyway? when life seems to be fucked up and you know nothing on how to solve it..thanks god..i finally found a room mate which suits me well..i'm not a coosy person but, in this case...i don't want to have mate that i can't talk to..well..here it is my life! totally fucked up shit!

so what changes in last two decades??

it's 2010! yeah, i celebrate another new year here in Kuching. not quite really having fun but, it's ok. so what changes in the last two decades (nearly)??? hmm...a lot..it seems that i can't never leave behind my past..it keeps on haunting me and i've keep on thinking 'if's. do i regret over the past? maybe. do i have anything to regret? i don't know. live continue as it is. i'm really determine to shed off few unnecessary kilos this year! i don't want to be plaque with all kind of diseases when i'm old. i've love, i've hate, i've been knocked under. that's my live, seems pretty obvious, we can't get everything that we want in this life. not that beautiful girl you use to adore. not that nice car that you see. not that big wonderful house that you love. seems a bit pessimistic but, i know what to expect in my life. that's life all about. anyway, welcome to our second year together dear, i love you, Michelle.